We interviewed Audrey Karrasch recently, and what she said touched us deeply.
The Reno, Nevada singer clearly had something to share with other artists wanting to make it in the music industry. Rather than tell us about her time on the US TV programme, “The Voice”, we wanted Audrey to tell us why she auditioned for it, and how the experience affected her. So, in what we hope will become a regular feature on Essentially Pop, we introduce Guest Editorials. here’s Audrey’s story.
For a very long time “Idol” was a show that broke the mould, that was a new innovative option for singers all over the country to have their shot and it was working.
Whether it was something that pissed the industry off or not it was finally a new way for artists to have a chance at singing on a big stage. Their chance to make it, get seen, have fans. I auditioned for Idol a couple of times.
The first time I did I wasn’t old enough to audition for American Idol, but I did attempt to audition for Junior Idol, and upon driving up the gate after waiting in a long stop and go car line at 3 AM, I was informed they had “met the quota” for 9 year olds. My heart was broken a little bit, but my mom was so encouraging and we continued on our road trip home singing along to the radio and dreaming about a music career. Reno is a small town and I made the most of it. I sang at every vocal competition I could, I sang the anthem at any game, event, High School assembly. After I won 1st place in a Reno singing competition they paid my way to Nashville to audition for American Idol. They invited me back 3 times. And after many months of waiting and practicing, they rejected me. I was honestly pissed off.
I was as shocked as anyone else when I auditioned for the Voice when I was 20. I think I thought I had already felt rejection so many times that I could handle it.
To my surprise rejection never occurred. I auditioned expecting to be turned away. My heart wasn’t in it. I was bored. I even forgot the words to my songs a handful of times. Why did they keep calling me? I think it was because I didn’t care enough to let my nerves get to me. They saw my personality; they saw that I was just like any 20 year old that could sing, that was fearless. But I felt more desperate than I did fearless.
That’s what saddens me most about that experience, was how desperate I was for validation. I needed something to call home and tell my family about so they didn’t think I was a crazy girl with delusional unrealistic dreams. For a moment I felt that. For the small time I was on the show I felt very important. I felt like I belonged somewhere. It was the first time in a while I didn’t feel crazy. I learned a great lesson from that show. The exposure I was thankful for, the opportunity, obviously. I guess I get agitated when I’m asked about The Voice because if I don’t preface every response with how grateful I was for the opportunity, I can look like a jackass. But I’m grateful for other reasons.
It’s not because I got to see some celebrities, or have my hair and makeup done. It wasn’t until being home for almost 3 months after the show that reality had set in. There was something very comforting about the radio silence I heard after I was “knocked off” Team Usher. I was alone, at home, sitting at my piano. I could sing as loud as I wanted and I could write whatever I desired without the fear of being judged and critiqued. The realization that I didn’t need a reality show, or anyTHING to validate my talent or love for music any more was incredible. This is the way it should be, and I love that about music.
For a small season I forgot the reason I fell in love with music to begin with. That’s what my experience was. It may seem very basic and simple to most people, but to me it’s more profound than a celebrity turning around in a chair because they might like the sound of my voice.
I hope other contestants from these shows share this with me, because it’s very enlightening. If you explore any situation you’re in with the hopes of learning something about your self it’s worth it.
*All photos are from Audrey’s instagram.